The Top 5 Things You Should Know About David Beckham
David Beckham is a legend, well at least in the UK, and all soccer loving nations around the world. They may not all like him, as he’s played for their rivals, or put their country out of a World Cup in the past, but they know all about him. And now he’s off to America, to play for L.A. Galaxy for a huge amount of money! So I thought it was time to educate the masses on the other side of the pond about Mr. Beckham, and why, love him or hate him, he’s become one of the biggest footballers in the world, and a pop culture icon.
1. He’s a great soccer player.
First off, this is soccer. Now that’s cleared up… Beckham is a midfielder, normally playing on the right hand side, although he prefers the centre… this means he gets more of the ball, and that does his ego no end of good. Known as a dead ball specialist, his legendary free kicks have bamboozled goalies around the world, and even led to a film being named after him. He played for Manchester United for 11 years, starting as the new pin up boy, replacing Ryan Giggs as the icon teenage girls fantasised about. The first time he came to most fans attention was this wonder goal against Wimbledon in 1996. Soon after that, he made his first appearance for the English national team, which he would later captain. Manchester United won the treble in 1999, a unique feat in British football, and Beckham was an integral part of the success. Beckham eventually fell out with manager Alex Ferguson, probably because there wasn’t room for both their big heads at one football club, and joined Real Madrid in 2003. He became one of the Galacticos, and a firm favourite with the Madrid fans, although he was never consistent enough to please the manager. In January 2007, Becks signed a 5 year deal with the L.A. Galaxy, and will start playing for them on July 1st.
2. He’s married to Posh, the thin, untalented Spice girl.
Ok, maybe that’s a bit cruel, she’s not that thin. But you surely remember the Spice girls don’t you? That annoying British all girl group featuring Scary (Hairy), Baby (She was at least 40), Sporty (Lesbian), Ginger (I’ve seen pictures, she’s not), and Posh (common as muck). Becks saw one of the band’s videos and decided he wanted to marry the skinny one who didn’t really sing much, and so it came to pass. They married in 1999, and have since had 3 kids Brooklyn, Romeo, and Cruz. She doesn’t really do much these days, except spend his fortune, although rumours persist of a Spice Girls reunion, can we all join in prayer that it never happens please.
3. He’s worth an absolute fortune.
In 2004, a survey was taken into footballers wealth, and unsurprisingly Beckham was top of the money league with an estimated fortune of $130 million, almost doubling Dennis Bergkamp’s fortune in 2nd place. In 2006, Becks is said to have increased his wealth to $150 million, and it’s still on the up. His deal with L.A. Galaxy will see him earn $50 million a year for the length of his contract. Even though David looks stupid, and sounds it too with his rather squeaky English voice, he’s actually a smart businessman, and has negotiated himself a dircet salary, profit sharing and endorse contract unrivalled in the world of soccer. Throughout his football career, Becks has actually made more from off the field promotions and advertising deals than on the field. Which leads us nicely to…
4. His hair has a life of it’s own.
It does, it really does! He started with a floppy young haircut full of vigour, and has since changed his haircut more times than I’ve changed my underwear. Blonde highlights, skinhead, mohawk, boy band look, another longer mohawk, alice band, corn rows, long and flowing, another skinhead, a gay quiff, and then his current look of bleached and womanly looking. He’s had them all, and there’s good reason too. His hair, and overall image has been on countless billboard posters, and full page glossy magazine adverts. If you want to sell a beauty product, get in touch with Mr Beckham, offer him a fortune, and he’ll do it.
5. Don’t mention Rebecca Loos.
If you ever happen to meet Becks, you know, in your local coffee shop or something, maybe even walmart if he gets desperate, then don’t mention the name Rebecca Loos to him. This is the girl who in 2004 claimed to have had an affair with David, while working as his personal assistant. Nothing has ever been proven, but this probably the strongest of the bed hopping rumours which surfaced about Beckham around this time. Loos famously did a $1 million deal with a British Sunday newspaper for the exclusive story, and has been living off the fame ever since. She now masturbates pigs off on live TV for a living, but I can’t bring Becks in to that.
So there we have it, don’t you feel you know more than you used to about our own David Beckham, in fact more than you ever wanted to know? I wish him well in America, as I don’t think he’ll have quite the impact now, he did on Europe 10 years ago. He’ll lap up the American lifestyle though, and I expect to see him in Hollywood films before long. You have been warned!
This article has been entered in to Darren Rowse’s ProBlogger ‘Top 5′ writing project. Check out his site, it’s an invaluable source for all bloggers, and I highly recommend it.
David Beckham, LA Galaxy, Posh Spice, Victoria Beckham, Soccer, Football, USA, Legend, UK, British, Britain, Manchester United, Ryan Giggs, Alex Ferguson, Real Madrid, Galacticos, Spice Girls, Advertising, Pro Blogger, Blogging, Darren Rowse, Top 5, Rebecca Loos
May 9th, 2007 at 5:03 pm
Great Top 5! I hope you win.
May 9th, 2007 at 6:31 pm
well there goes my chances of winning. dammit. LOL
May 9th, 2007 at 7:24 pm
Ya know, I liked the Spice Girls. One year for Halloween my college roommates and I dressed up like them. I was baby.
Beckham is hot, although I find Posh a bit creepy.
May 9th, 2007 at 8:22 pm
Beckham gets a resounding MEH from me, and England can have him and his pin thin wifey back, as far as I’m concerned. This is America - we’re full up on crazy already, thanks. Good post though
May 10th, 2007 at 4:20 am
Hello:
I don’t know much about Mr. David Beckham except that he is married to Posh Spice and was a great soccer playing.
I wonder why by now, England has not yet knighted him?
Your article is interesting.
It is welcome news that he is on his way to US to play for LA Galaxy.
This way, we in USA may really know the real Mr. Becks. I wish him well.
Ikey Benney
May 10th, 2007 at 8:40 am
Sanjaya Malakar could get some hair tips from him:)
May 10th, 2007 at 9:15 am
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May 10th, 2007 at 11:01 am
I’m a big fan of Beckham. Rebecca Loos aside, he is very professional in his business, works hard and a family man, a good role model for kids. More so than a lot of other footballers.
You can tell he is taught well at Manchester United, as he doesn’t go out get bladdered and sleep with strippers. When was the last time you saw a Man U player that did that, and - if you can - look at where he is now. I bet he’s not at Manchester United.
May 10th, 2007 at 11:55 am
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May 10th, 2007 at 3:05 pm
I really don’t know who David Beckham is, but I do know in America soccor is not very popular as baseball or our football, mainly it is the kids who play, hence the word soccor mom, I am one of them, I did my own poll most could really care less if he came here, most did not know who he is, maybe he will make it popular who know, I am not watching.
May 10th, 2007 at 3:33 pm
excellence post.. love it.. i’m a fan of beckham.. he is just great..
Check my posting on Top 5
May 10th, 2007 at 3:52 pm
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May 10th, 2007 at 5:10 pm
Excellent top 5 Dave.
Here’s an article about the Americanisation of Football in the UK. Apologies if you’ve seen it before.
http://www.football365.com/story/0,17033,8751_1900497,00.html
Yeah, I know that Beckham never played for Liverpool and I know that the article is vaguely racist, but it’s worth a look.
May 10th, 2007 at 5:23 pm
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May 10th, 2007 at 5:34 pm
Great stuff, Dave.
One of my favorite Ali G segments is when he interviewed Beckham and Posh on some British fundraising program.
Ali G interviews Beckham and Posh:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UgrbH5gZWts\
May 10th, 2007 at 7:23 pm
Good post. I’m a soccer guy, and used to be with the Galaxy. Becks will fit right into vain-ville USA.
May 10th, 2007 at 8:27 pm
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